Recently I’ve found myself at a loss for words and direction. I’ve come to a fork in the road where my brain says to take a left and my heart says to take a right. It’s the most troubling feeling having to stand in between those two paths and making a decision.
It hurts to have to answer the questions plaguing my mind. Somedays I want to cry and other days I want to scream. Honestly, I don’t know how I feel. I don’t know what I want and I don’t know how to move forward from here.
The puzzle I’ve made is missing the middle piece but I’ve seemed to have misplaced that piece. The chain of the necklace I wear sparkles but it lacks a pendant in the center. My face is still there but the happy smile it once possessed is no longer present.
I suppose I could pretend that everything is alright, but in the end that just results in self-destruction and inner turmoil.
“Comfort in expressing your emotions will allow you to share the best of yourself with others, but not being able to control your emotions will reveal your worst,” said by Bryant H. McGill
My emotions are in this constant state of battle where each one thinks it has the right to overrule what my mind knows to be true. When my guard is down they begin a battle each one saying that it is right or that it has devised the right move.
My mind will win as it always does, but the process of having my mind take over the emotional side of myself is very time consuming.
I’ve spent so much time listening to the lies and false accusations, that sorting it all through is a very hard path to travel alone.
So about those paths that I spoke about in the beginning, the one involving my heart and the other my mind. I have yet to come to a conclusion with real answers because I am undecided. I don’t know what I need from each path anymore.